Evil Marble Bundt Cake
Time:
1h30m
Difficulty:
Intermediate
Loot
1 bundt cake
Why would I call a bundt cake recipe “intermediate?”
To be honest, because this recipe used to piss me off. There are many crucial little steps and substitutions that you need to get just right to pull this off. Also, greasing the bundt pan properly for this one is a topflight pain in the ass because of the cake’s fat content, which made it hard to get out of the pan, and even harder to clean. Seriously. This recipe got me banned from baking for a little while back during my Freshman year of high school.
Nonetheless, after I reincarnated this recipe one summer after the ban was lifted, my family would beg me to make this recipe on virtually a weekly basis. And I happily obliged. Because…it’s just worth it. The chocolate half of this cake’s swirl is truly a statement of its own, with a richly ingrained dark cocoa that dances beautifully with the texture of the moist and airy vanilla. Truly the ultimate breakfast, after-school snack, or 11PM theft.
Now that I’ve got the technique down, and have learned to control my temper slightly better, ’m ready to impart this incredible recipe to you,
Word to the Wise
Use cooking spray. I know, I have never used cooking spray in my life. But for this recipe, you need it. I tried everything from butter to flour to olive oil. I even asked my friend (let’s call her “Syrup”), who used to bake these for a living, how she greased the pan without destroying the cake. Apparently the answer was: a secret cooking spray. Well, screw “Syrup” and her secrets. We’ll have to suck it up and use regular storebought flour-based cooking spray.
For the buttermilk (also in INSTRUCTIONS):
Use 1 cup of milk (remember, no skim godammit), and combine it with 1 tbsp of vinegar or lemon juice
Stir gently and let it rest for 5-10 minutes until it curdles.
Wanna take it to the next level? Don’t use buttermilk.
You can sub this with 1 cup of full-fat sour cream, or 1 cup of full-fat greek yogurt. Key word is full fat.
If you only have nonfat greek yogurt, no worries. We’re also a gym rat household. Add 1 tbsp of heavy whipping cream to 1 cup nonfat (shut up) greek yogurt, to sub.
For the cake flour (annoying, I know), this will make the 3 cups you need (also in Instructions):
Add 3 cups of all-purpose flour to a mixing bowl.
Remove 6 tbsp of flour from the bowl and put it back in the bag.
Cleaning off your spoon with a slightly damp towel, and drying it off afterward (just to clean it), add in 6 tbsp of cornstarch.
Whisk your mixture together until it has one fine consistency.
Regarding your choice of milk: We’ve been over this. No skim milk. But for this one, whole milk is definitely encouraged.
When you add in the milk for the vanilla batter, WARM it in the microwave until room temperature (around 20 seconds). It should feel the same temperature as your shower the moment the water heater goes out.
Ingredients
Cake:
1 cup unsalted butter, softened (2 sticks)
2 ½ cup granulated sugar
1 tbsp vanilla extract
4 large eggs, room temperature
1 cup cold milk
1 tbsp vinegar or lemon juice
3 cups all-purpose flour
6 tbsp cornstarch
2 tsp baking powder
½ tsp salt
For the chocolate swirl:
⅔ cup cocoa powder
½ cup milk, room-temperature
For the vanilla side:
1 tsp vanilla extract
Instructions:
Get a large bowl from your cabinet and fill it to the top with lukewarm water (think bathwater temperature). Make sure that it’s below boiling. Drop your eggs in this water and let them sit for a while. We’ll come back to these.
Get your buttermilk ready:
Add 1 cup of milk to a random glass, bowl, or measuring cup
Add in 1 tbsp of vinegar or lemon juice and stir lightly.
Let it sit at room temperature.
Get your cake flour ready if you don’t have any on-hand:
Add 3 cups of all-purpose flour to a mixing bowl.
Remove 6 tbsp of flour from the bowl and put it back in the bag.
Cleaning off your spoon with a slightly damp towel, and drying it off afterward (just to clean it), add in 6 tbsp of cornstarch.
Add in your baking powder and salt. Whisk your mixture together until it has one fine consistency.
Preheat your oven to 350 degrees Fahrenheit.
Spray down your Bundt pan, and dust some extra flour or cocoa powder into the grooves. This’ll help make it less sticky.
In a large or stand mixer bowl, use a paddle attachment or spatula and beat together your softened butter and sugar until creamy.
Check on your eggs. They should be around room temperature and no longer be cold to the touch. They’re ready. One at a time, add each egg to the mix individually and stir until combined. Repeat this process until you’re done with the eggs.
Drop in 1 tbsp of vanilla extract and your buttermilk. Stir until combined.
In three parts, add in your cake flour, baking powder, and salt, stirring on low until just incorporated each time. Do not overmix!
Get out a large separate bowl. Pour out a little more than one-third of the batter into this bowl (trust yourself).
In a separate measuring cup or microwave-safe bowl, zap your milk for about 15-20 seconds or until room-temperature.
To the large stand-mixer bowl, add your cocoa powder and room-temperature milk. Stir until fully combined.
To your separate bowl with the plain batter, drop in the remaining 1 tsp of vanilla extract. Fold and stir from bottom to top until it’s fully incorporated.
Loop:
Using a spoon, a ladle, a ¼ cup measuring cup, or a spatula (whatever you have), drop a spoonful of your plain vanilla batter into the bundt pan.
Using a separate scooping tool, drop an nearly identical (to the best of your ability) spoonful of your chocolate batter into the bundt pan.
Repeat alternating between these two until you run out of batter. DO NOT STIR.
Give the pan a few taps to level out the batter. For a bonus swirl, run a toothpick or a chopstick in a zig-zag pattern through the batter. But DO NOT STIR.
Put your pan in the oven for 50-70 minutes (do your first checks at 55 minutes).
Put in a wooden toothpick or a chopstick towards the center of the pan. If it comes out clean, then it’s ready to come out. If not, give it 5 more minutes.
Cool the cake in a pan for at least 15-20 minutes.
Serving
Use a knife along the sides and center of the bundt pan in a clean shape to ensure it doesn’t stick too much. Carefully flip the bundt pan over onto a wire rack or cake plate. Slice it up and enjoy! It can be stored for about 2 days on a cake plate.
